DAY 23: The Most Dangerous Word A Meditator Can Use
Discover how 3 little letters can scupper your success.
We have all worked on making changes in our life, over the years. And we all have our own favourite ways of making change work – or perhaps sabotaging it – even without realising. But there’s one little word that can throw away all the efforts you are making to change. And it’s only 3 letters long.
Want to know what the most dangerous word is, when you are learning to meditate or pick up any other kind of habit? This three lettered word slips into our conversation, without us noticing.
It is. . . cue drum roll…
- I’ll try to meditate each day.
- I’ll try to do ten minutes.
- I’ll try to remember to do it.
- I’ll try to learn the technique.
- I’ll try to let go of being attached to my thoughts.
- I’ll try to taste my tea.
What happens when we say the word ‘try’?
Just think each of those sentences through for yourself for a moment and notice the physical reaction – there will be one – somewhere in your body. Though it’s subtly different for each of us, there’s a common theme.
The word ‘try’ allows us to ‘half-pretend’, when we’re going to make changes. It is as though we’re not really committed.
Saying “I’ll try to do something,” allows the option of not doing it. In fact, more than ‘allowing’, it almost ‘encourages’ or gives us permission not to achieve our goal. Even saying these phrases in our mind – just thinking them – rather than saying them out loud, has the power to impact our results. We are using our thoughts to programme our mind with our truly intended outcome – just like a SatNav.
Of course, we always have choice, but if we say, “I’ll try to meditate this morning,” deep down we know there is a strong likelihood that we won’t do it. We haven’t really made the choice.
We aren’t really committed.
What’s the answer?
The answer to this is very simple. Instead of, “I’ll try to meditate this morning,” you can use phrases like:
I choose to meditate this morning.
I choose to do ten minutes or more.
I choose to notice the difference it is making.
This isn’t about an ‘either-or’ scenario. It’s not about forcing yourself to make the change. It’s about opening up your choices; opening up your options. Yes, something might still get in the way and you might not do your meditation today, but if all you’ve said in your unconscious mind is, “I’ll try”, then your Monkey Mind knows it has got your permission not to bother! And if you’ve made a commitment and you want to meditate today, then ‘try’ is not the word you want to be using.
Of course this applies in anything we want to do in life:
I’ll try to get the report done by the week-end.
I’ll try to remember to call you tonight.
Please try to remember to email me.
‘Try’ is like Monopoly’s ‘get out of jail free’ card, permitting us to pretend we’re going to do something, without really having to make that commitment.
‘Trying’ is a way of saying, “Yes, but probably no.”
The way we think and the subtleties of the language we use in our thoughts have a big impact on what we actually experience and create. ‘Try’ isn’t your friend most of the time. You might like to consider waving it goodbye.
If there’s anywhere else in your world that you’re using the word ‘try’ on a regular basis, you might like to look at that situation. Maybe you’re resisting something?
Maybe you’ve not really bought into the commitment? Maybe your unconscious mind is trying to tell you that you don’t really want to be doing it?
I’ve written a short bonus article for you if you’d like to know more about making conscious choices. You can find it at:
Play with other phrases you could use instead of ‘try’ and notice how this simple change can make subtle and yet powerful shifts in your experience of life.
My invitation for you today, on Day 23 of the 28 Day Meditation Challenge, is to stop trying and just do it!
Day 23 Affirmation
I allow my choices to help me stay committed on my meditation journey.
I hope you really enjoy your meditation today.
P. S. Tomorrow we’ll be talking about the magic phrase that can change your life.
P.P.S. The key links you need for week four are:
Week 4 Meditation: